Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Self Doubt

I had a strange thing happen to me today. 

I had a look at the map of the New York City marathon which I pulled out of last months issue of Runner's World.  I have mentioned previously that I plan on running this marathon in November of 2011.  As I was looking at this map, the start line at the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge, the pathway through the 5 boroughs, the finish at Central Park...

I felt doubt.  I suddenly didn't feel so sure that I could run in and finish the marathon.

This would be common if NYC was to be my first marathon experience.  But it's not.  It will likely be my 9th time pounding out a 26.2.  I have no idea where the doubt came from.  Maybe because I've been hibernating from the cold for a few days?  Maybe because I haven't run any distance at all since Chicago?  Maybe?  Maybe?  Maybe?  I know that self-doubt is something that everyone experiences from time to time; life is full of new and unique situations, all of which likely force us to consider our level of confidence and how we do perceive ourselves in the world often dictates our response to these situations.  But I am CONFIDENT in my ability to complete a marathon.  So why the doubt?  And why now?

I may never figure out where this (hopefully!) moment of doubt has it's roots but I do know one thing for certain; I am confident it will go away.  I am confident because I will help it the only way I know how...

I'll go running.

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